You would have to be a theatre major...

Here are a few of the interesting things you learn in theatre, especially in tech. class:

Nothing can be given its ordinary name. For example, in lighting, a mirror must be called a reflector, and a bulb must be called a lamp.

A dutchman is not someone from Holland. Rather, it is a thin strip of matching material placed on the seam between two flats to hide the crack.

If it looks good from twenty feet away, it's perfect.

You must be able to have a secret conversation in front of thousands of spectators.

Reciting tongue twisters, and pretending to throw axes at one another while making deep grunts, are two crucial methods of warming up the voice and the mind respectively.

If the teacher tells you you've gone too far, that's a good thing.

A morally supportive comment might go something like, "I could really see the cat work come out in your part! Your voice was too poisonously smooth to describe. Excellent job keeping your friend in one place. And, you never lost sight of the fact that you were wearing a hoop skirt - good job of throwing your gestures out."

When delivering a monologue to a nonexistent party, place them somewhere in the audience, but don't stare at the director.

An arbor is a place to put counterweights in order to fly objects from the battens.

You learn that every single thing in theatre has a particular way that it's always built.

You never realized there were so many other people who burst out in song and dance, disdain chairs, dread monologues, like to dress in odd outfits that are really more related to costumes than clothes, and talk in accents half the time.

The joys of being a theatre major.